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☕ c h e e r s

Can’t work, cat wants cuddles.

One great way to get rid of an earworm is screaming until they tranquillize you

The phase I’m currently going through is: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Everything Hurts: A Memoir.

I must have slept funny. When I woke up my hair looked like Jim Carrey's.

*Flicks ash in your kombucha

I only have so much hate in my heart, and I reserve it for those who litter, those who commit atrocities to other living beings, and those who drink shaken espressos.

She’s a ten but the last screenshot she posted showed her phone battery at 4%.

Terrifying if literal: dream job

people need to stop giving in to hate it’s always gonna be a really bad thing

Me: oh! Mmm! Babe, let’s goooooo! Husband: 👀 Me: pizza pics

live, laugh, let a fart

some of you should block yourselves

live, laugh, lettuce diarrhea

Lyrical age verification: 🎶straight up now tell me🎶

The apocalypse will come upon us like a lease of the night.

forgot the name for spanakopita so wrote swirly cheese thing on my shopping list i'm not even joking

Happy birthday fellow leo @oujt.bsky.social hope you have a great one! 🦁🥳🧡🍀

Song lyric age verification! "well i think i'm losing my mind this time this time i'm losing my mind that's right"