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Peed the bed. Wasn’t asleep.

I would do some quite weird stuff for like $3k a month

Getting death threats on the NASA message board for saying Tang is Martian piss

who did nice today?

That guy who cloned himself for parts except the clone gets deported cuz it's here illegally

Sorry you’re mad at me because I’m friggin awesome.

I’m sorry I got everyone in trouble by being up past bsky bedtime.

i did that hot crazy scale and naturally i was in the danger zone

damn babe are you a diamond in the rough? cause i’d let you into my cave of wonders.

omg

for the classic mcknuckle sandwich but with a punch

apparently my catchphrase is “… but i’m a dumb bitch, don’t be like me.”

four versions of baddie 🙂‍↕️

This vodka tastes like I’m going to order McDonald’s for dinner

her: i go through cox me: that’s a crazy way to tell me your internet provider

apparently my catchphrase is “… but i’m a dumb bitch, don’t be like me.”

god i’m a slut for cold redbull

i’m craving a tinned fish snack the stuffed squid was delicious

whoever invented lunch was a genius

i let someone lure me into a new bar. send thoughts and vibes