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*shouting from the backdoor Goin out Ma!

I had a homework joke but the dog ate it.

healthy choice Woody, what meat are you feasting upon on the 'morrow my good Sir?

I ate my mother-in-law and she still didn't agree with me.

Peter Griffin's Diarrhea Pants - Family GuyALT: Peter Griffin's Diarrhea Pants - Family Guystatic.klipy.com

that soon escalated..😆

I failed my drug test. I could only remember 3 names for cannabis and forgot the ingredients to cook meth with.

oh yeah..bank account, wallet, secret stash under the bed, safety deposit box and even the jar of change you keep in the car for parking.

my Mrs is very taxing.

careful leaving any massive mallets hanging around the house😉

Animaniacs: Wakko Warner with MalletALT: Animaniacs: Wakko Warner with Malletstatic.klipy.com

NKOTB will do that..🤭

Tom Chino: Spinning on a Record PlayerALT: Tom Chino: Spinning on a Record Playerstatic.klipy.com

TIME FOR EXTREME BLERRIFICATION WHAT THAT IS I DON'T EXACTLY KNOW YET!

if only he knew...

Labi Siffre - Bless the Telephone (In Concert: Labi Siffre, 07/06/1971)YouTube video by DemonMusicGroupwww.youtube.com

why are harbingers always of doom why can’t we have harbingers of cake?

FIFA FOFUM I smell the blood..

Myth: Men don’t gossip. Fact: Men gossip—we just call it “talking shit about the guy who parks like an asshole.”

bound and gagged in me basement 🤭

The difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for free usually costs more in the long run.

my narcissism tells me I am etched in a lot of peoples’ memories for all eternity