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Thankfully, it didn’t take longer. Progressive would be nice to continue the process of building on Francis’ legacy instead of walking the Church back

That's a lot of unnecessary pollution. Couldn't they just send a text? /s

False alarm, pasta is on full boil.

I miss Dave Allen! Enough said.

Funny that these people being so close to god need to have multiple votes to select the pope - why doesn’t their imaginary friend just send them his choice ?!?

Bless you all Pope Hedgieus the First.

I hope they didn't give in to MAGA bribes to choose a pro-MAGA pope. A pope that supports MAGA would be worse than the Borgia pope.

* YAWN * Who cares? The whole religious thing is a sad circus of irrationality.

What an amazing choice 🙏🙏

It’s me

As long as it's not Trump the church is safe.

Hopefully it's a cool young Pope and he rolls out of the Vatican on a skateboard.

Listen, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

Looks like they are just getting a good brisket going.

Thank god it's not orange smoke! 😉

June 14th we take to the streets once again to continue our fight against tyranny, and our fight for those that are in danger of being disenfranchised or deported. We all must stand up for one another.

Or somebody fell into a pizza oven.

💙

Dang. I was planning to DoorDash in Vatican City.

Love the excitement from the seagulls. I hope it’s a sign they picked a decent person.

I'm Pretty Sure Tagle Will Be The Next Pope

Holy smokes

WHOOOO HOOOO, but not really!

Krasnov? 🤣

Whoever it is needs to stay away from JD Vance.

🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽💨💙

The white smoke is 6 more weeks of winter, right? 🤔

@down.blue por favor

Followed by blue smoke, which means it's a boy.

It's not going to be good news, I fear. I hope that I am wrong. 🫤

First smoke then mirrors

I wonder how many children the new Pope has raped?

Itsa be a the pizzaballa guy a?

Hopefully not who Opus Dei & Peter Thiel wanted.💰

that was so fast, it feels like it must’ve been close to a foregone conclusion before they started. Anyone know when the new Pope will be identifed?

HOLY SMOKES!!!

I heard it’s a boy!

This is the biggest news of the year

So I wonder how pissed is tRump that the Pope overshadowed his tariff deal…😂😂😂

Wow the first pope from the United States Awesome 🤍✝️ I am a happy Catholic today 🙏💜💜💜💜💜💜

This one seems to have gone quickly

so many new Cardinals watched the movie Conclave to prepare for this moment. Because of that, I’ll wager that John Lithgow is the new pope.

When does Donnie leave for Rome?

Oh wow hopefully they made the right decision of not electing a conservative pope

Is it Pizzaballa bc there is so much one can do with a Pope Pizzaballa.

They must have had a successor already in mind that was so fast

black smoke white smoke new pope cadillac

That was quick!

That was quick

Since orange smoke didn’t pour from the chimney, I guess that there’s not going to be a Pope Donnie I.

Or they have a chimney fire...

bsky.app/profile/theo...

This is how fast Cardinals work when you take their phones away

"To His Holiness Pope Leo XIV, first among the sons of America to ascend the Throne of Saint Peter:May the Holy Spirit guide thy reign, that thy wisdom may shepherd the faithful through shadow and light.Let all Christendom rejoice, for God hath chosen a new Vicar to bind and loose. Ad multos annos!”

Wait oh what? That was quick.

Just once I wish they’d have pink smoke just to throw everyone off.

I'm Pope now

youtube.com/shorts/Lrcqw...

How does the Vatican make black and white smoke?YouTube video by RTÉ Newsyoutube.com

In my world this signifies the brisket is ready.

That was fast, the Cardinals must not have wanted to wait to stream Poker Face

Ok honest question why is the white smoke the sign of selected pope…

It's about to Pope off y'all!!

welcome pope pizza

Popeular. You're gonna be Pope-u-lar!

a woman in a pink dress is saying " popular i know about popular "ALT: a woman in a pink dress is saying " popular i know about popular "media.tenor.com

if it's not Pizzaballa I'm going to be disappointed for at least 30 seconds.

Pope Luigi?

Here’s video of that moment

Видео

The pope announcement is destined to be a disappointment because no real life scenario will be as edgy as the ending of "Conclave"

Would be cool if they could pick a decent pope but that has never happened and will probably never happen.

You guessed it,

Bloody Hell that was Quick! Can't wait to Hear who the New Pope is, That is Some Kind of Record!

Welcome Pope Leo The 14th Born in Chicago but worked in the missions in Peru and in Latin America, and follows St Francis's theologies. He's no friend to Donny Two Dolls or Jd Vance He has Peruvian Ancestry so he is an Latino American. ‼️HABEMUS PAPEM‼️ ‼️WE HAVE A NEW POPE‼️

The Alter boys must have been impatient.

A new pedophile cult leader? How exciting.

Someone wanted an early weekend.

They always break out the good stuff for the new pope.

Nonbinary gender reveal

He should stay away from JD

Hope whoever it is won’t go backwards & isn’t trumpy.

Burning their spooge stained Kleenex. Hide the altar boys.

Congratulations to Pope Pierbattista Pizzaballa I? 50% off all pizza balls at Pizza Poppa's through Sunday!

It was Rigged

ITS JEB!

And with the first pick, Vatican City selects..

two men in suits and ties are standing in front of a screen that says @sbnationALT: two men in suits and ties are standing in front of a screen that says @sbnationmedia.tenor.com

😬I sure hope the next Pope stays on the trajectory that the last one was one. Love and peace and compassion.

Wow so fast

If they elected him that quickly, it will be a tradition-upholder and will send the priests back to their altar boys and each other

Pope Pizzaballa....anyone who bet him will make a lot of dough.

🤷🏽🤷🏽🤷🏽

I bet it's David Tennant.

Is it Donald Trump?

it’s him!

I think they should have a pipe light, like Batman’s.

Check the cardinals’ LinkedIn

They're stoned.

Pizza baller is the only right answer. Gen X with an awesome name 😆

Cmon pizzaballa!

I predict, Luis Antonio Tagle.

Either that, or their head gasket blew and is leaking coolant into the cylinders.

Let us all hope that it is someone who is the exact opposite of whom Opus Dei lobbied for

Is it Aaron Rodgers? I was hoping George Santos gets it.

It should have been Gritty

Who cares

How will Trump cope?

I'm not Catholic but I hope the Pope doesn't suck.

Did they edit out the seagulls?

I can only hope, this Pope continues to embrace all of humanity just like his predecessor.

He missed big naming opportunities - he could have been Pope Paul Bunyan, or Pope John Henry, or Pope Johnny Appleseed...

I hope it's another Borgia Pope

In related news Even after the white smoke, G-d remains an incomprehensible mystery h/t Karl Rahner

Let me guess…it’s a man!

thank goodness. Every news station - local, national, international - I watch is fixated on the new pope process. As a former Catholic I don't understand why this is preempting all the other things happening in the world.

Pizzaballa! 🍕

All hail Pope Ratthew the first🔥🐀

Ivanka

That is one janky ass chimney

Uh....yay?

Please be a woke pope please be a woke pope 🙏🏻

Frida hopes it’s Cooper Flagg.

Or a brisket has been made! 😂

That was really fast! I feel like after witnessing a few of these votes, they already had an idea of who was next. Any update on who?

🙏

Praying that the new Pope is as wonderful as Pope Francis was!

Please let it not be a nazi

Burning the evidence of systemic sexual abuse that's been going on forever without any 'real' intervention -- cover-ups, instead.

Thank God, it was white. If it had been blue, Trump would’ve been elected pope.

The new Pope and his Poop

a man and a woman pose for a picture in front of a sign that says kennedy centerALT: a man and a woman pose for a picture in front of a sign that says kennedy centermedia.tenor.com

🙏 for a progressist: Conservators are protectionists of the DOGMA, against LGBT, women in clergy & marriage for priests

Oh goody. My day is complete.

Puff puff pass….

I'm having lambshank tonight if it is

I just hope he takes the name Guido. It’s time to have a Pope Guido.

And we’re off to the races! Who will it be?💙🍌

a cartoon character says how should i do it in front of a purple and pink backgroundALT: a cartoon character says how should i do it in front of a purple and pink backgroundmedia.tenor.com

youtu.be/53GrVNFArHQ?...

La Coka Nostra Feat. B-Real - I'm An AmericanYouTube video by LaCokaNostrayoutu.be

Seems he is from US, hmmm what did it cost republicans to have that happen?🤨why else did the orangeman dress as pope?! Seems fishy?

what already?

This feels really fast no? I have memory of the last two popes taking much longer, and its been one day I think.

High atmospheric pressure day in Rome today, winds from the southwest

Hopefully it's either Cardinal Stanley Tucci, Cardinal Ralph Fiennes, or Cardinal John Lithgow.