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I cause quite the commotion being the only guy working at the library. All the women there threw them shelves at me.

this pan is now warped, like our collective hive mind

Is there a greater feat in adulthood than conquering a stainless steel pan?

some of you should block yourselves

i thought an Onion Ring was a loose affiliation of vegetable smugglers

Onion rings are the only safe way for me to eat vegetables now

short posts are called postellas

I'm a soldier In a Greek horse I hide I'm one of Several others inside - Trojon Bon Jovi

sorry; i'll keep my blog on my account from now on :D

THAT'S BC NOBODY HERE HAS A LIFE, OHHHHHHH

I see this in conflict resolution 'guides' all the time too. "do you find that you're angry in a conflict? maybe try just not being angry, or at least not expressing it! hope this helps"

not to mention that a) 1% is a LOT, 2) it was 1% with a massive shutdown. we don't know what it would have been if we hadn't quarantined, but there are models and it's not 1%, and d) people who don't understand science, math, and medicine shouldn't be offering opinions

dave matthews, 2026 "and you come *crash*... out like meeeee yeahhh"

loved that bit in the Odyssey where they're like “well, due to us writing all of this down, at least the world will always know how beautiful Helen is, and certainly not argue about any aspect of her appearance”

"I first saw a screenshot of Ricky's tweet from 2016 on an Instagram content scraper account, and knew right then I had to stalk him"

[girl introducing boyfriend to parents in 2026] GF: Mom, dad, this is Ricky, he has fuckin boss-ass content

you don't say l'way

Also, Facts of Life reruns

My dietary requirements are pretty complex. I need something from the four food groups: ✅ rooty ✅ tooty ✅ fresh ✅ fruity

time for cardio [sings Dio songs in car]