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[me demanding pictures of cats like j jonah jameson demanding pictures of spiderman]

the divine bitch in me recognizes the divine bitch in you namaste

People who wear plaid pants need to keep their asses in check

Got thrown out of mime school for not putting silencers on my finger guns

Me: It’s sweet how my cat sits on my chest to comfort me when I’m sick in bed. Cat: I think I’ll eat the eyes first.

I miss the old days when people would just cough once then quietly pass away

barely scratching the surface of the stack of tweet drawings, but here's another from the archive, this one based on a tweet by @unfitz.bsky.social - this made me remember when I used to draw animated characters kicking and punching each other in Animation Works in 7th grade just because I could

opening a spirit halloween where my faith in humanity used to be

I’m not a pharmacist but I do recommend drugs to certain people.

Them: What are those scars from? Me: Hitting rock bottom

reading people’s pinned posts like it’s their tombstone

gender specific washrooms still confuse me how can they tell which toilets are boys and which are girls

*at a crying competition but theres an upset baby just raking in the wins*

very strongly worded at that

i did it. i walked the camino de santiago from france to fisterra. i actually walked 500 miles. the proclaimers are lying liars no one walks 500 more.

so youre telling me not only do i have to compete against the entire world but that my own brain will sabotage me at every turn

if not fren why fren shaped [me to empty calories]

ugggggh why does the collapse of society have to take so long im bored

the most beautiful part of the animal kingdom is no redacted statements if animals say it they stand by it