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I was just reading about the upcoming film "Elsinore," about Ian Charleson, who starred in "Chariots of Fire." He was cast as Hamlet at the National Theatre after Daniel Day-Lewis dropped out, having seen his own father when the ghost appeared on stage.

............the fuck did I just read?

Aw, man

it made so much more sense as Tim Robinson.

In the interview, he literally complains that these days you can't even have an affair with your secretary without it ruining your family when it comes out. That's in his own words the cancel culture he's talking about.

"you and your mom need to set up some boundaries."

One time this guy we lived with did mushrooms and then told a story about his grandma coming back to see him as a sea gull. He had tears in his eyes as we tried not to guffaw.

Lol

Hell yeah bro. The lesson here is to watch yourself constantly or you could turn into an absolutely detached from reality freak person.

Did he do some sort of shithead healturn or something where he talks about things that are only a figment of the imagination?

I mean...aren't tabloid headlines Faux News' bread and butter?

WTF Tim??? I am beginning to think that trip makes you lose your mind, not find yourself!!!

TIL how to spell iowaska

Wait, he has Mommy issues? No way!

Tim be all trippin

Psychedelic Trippy Tunnel VisualsALT: Psychedelic Trippy Tunnel Visualsstatic.klipy.com

choosing to read the subhed as: 'Erik the Viking' star described an intense spiritual encounter with the next world during the ceremony

Pooooooor Tim 🫠😑 Tim Robbins drops by Rogan to declare that ayahuasca fixed his cancel culture woes share.google/jaf27A7Il5qk...

Tim Robbins drops by Rogan to declare that ayahuasca fixed his cancel culture woesTim Robbins drops by Rogan to declare that ayahuasca fixed his cancel culture woesshare.google

I'm still a little loopy from my sedative and I thought he turned to Shakshuka

Jesus, these losers really do just want to scream racist words while grabbing the PA’s ass and pontificating about what a genius they are. It’s so fucking pathetic.

"You know... for kids!"

Everyone who is mad about "cancel culture" should take the ego death drug. It might fix a few of them, and a lot more will drop out of public life to do more ayahuasca, which I also consider a win.

The stuff you perceive while on drugs isn't real. That's kind of the point. Thanks for coming to my TED talk ✌️

JFC I cannot imagine the ghastly behavior that is weighing on his rotting soul.

Gesundheit, Tim

I was so depressed yesterday over Fauci being abused and humiliated at the pleasure of Trump that I ate an entire bag of Reeses Werewolf Tracks. It did improve my mood but I realize I can't go on like this.

FFS!... ""They tell you to go in with an intention," Robbins said during a candid appearance on "The Joe Rogan Experience."... "When Joe Rogan asked what battle he believed he was fighting, Robbins pointed squarely at today's culture wars." ...dude went on Rogan to complain about the culture wars🤡

Read this too quickly - thought we were talking about this guy

You Sure About That? Skeptical MemeALT: You Sure About That? Skeptical Memestatic.klipy.com

What?!

Full circle Jacob's Ladder. Being married to Susan probably broke him

wait, he failed Tony Robbins class of walking on volcano coals?

Enter The Void, but it ends with the main character being reborn black so he can finally say the n-word.

So, he basically turned into his role in War of the Worlds.

Get busy livin…

Anyone else have to Google Ayahuasca?

God, I'm so tired.

Does he know there are are like, real things you can be consumed by anger over? There are not a small number of real, legitimate, genuinely enraging things you can be mad about. Obvious, not obscure or esoteric things too, fucking tons of them.

That’ll fix his injured mind.

Ok man

I believe psychedelics could do a lot of good for a lot of people but some are just irredeemable. Like Joe rogan.

🙄🤢

But did he teleport to a Waffle House?

Who's been cancelling Tim Robbins??

What a dick.

… I thought this was Onion.

Who?

I didn't know he was a massive hater lol

How do you top this? (Altho I know you will.)

Oh my god, get a grip.

A celebrity angry about cancel culture is elite entitlement. Also makes me wonder what creepy disgusting things Tim Robbins has done.

Oh no

This is how I found out he broke up with Susan Sarandon in 2009.

I don’t even know what he was canceled for, but this response says it all anyway.

Is he mad about Polanski?

Oh, so he's actually turned into the sleaze bag that he portrayed on "The Player." No wonder I haven't seen him in anything lately.

I want to vomit and I didn’t even ingest ayahuasca.

Yeah I don’t think “cancel culture” is the problem there.

stealing onion headlines again

Throws away vhs copy of Arlington Road

Starting to think Andy dufresne really did murder his wife

"You know, for kids!"

Was terribly worried this meant he had been cancelled for some reason - had to Google to check

could he be MORE unbearable

who?

Bull Durham 2: Ayahuasca Boogaloo.

This has to be from The Onion

Aaron Rodgers credited the South American psychoactive plant brew ayahuasca with helping his mental health, deepen self-love, and win back-to-back NFL MVP awards. 

Im just gonna go ahead and assume every rich or famous person is an asshole unless they prove otherwise like Mark Hamill or Bruce Springsteen…

Okay Tim, whatever

Did he crawl thru shit again??

He also invented the hula hoop.

Tim Robbins worried that his chances of getting diarrhea in Trump’s America were not great enough?

Sure why not

Really diving into method acting for Bull Durham 2, huh?

This has to be you, right? Lololol

May he experience an epiphany and receive enlightenment!

He is still crazy for his crazy ex-wife…

Maybe he should breathe through his eyelids…

Oh no he’s a dumdum

This makes more sense than this cringy silliness:

Timothy Robins in Hudsucker Proxy: You Know, For Kids!Alt: Tim Robins in Hudsucker Proxy: You Know, For Kids! Holding a picture of a circlestatic.klipy.com

This is an Onion headline, right?

🤷‍♀️ Ayahuasca is called "Vine of the Soul" & has been used for millennia to traverse realms of spirit. Many people ingesting Ayahuasca have reported connecting with their ancestors beyond the veil. tv.apple.com/us/movie/aya...

Ayahuasca: Vine of the Soul - Apple TVCan a sacred plant medicine from the Amazon heal our minds and spirits? In the heart of the jungle, a naturopathic doctor and an accountant experience…tv.apple.com

Chances the intense experience with his late mother was sexual? I'm saying at least 75%

Misread this as "Tim RobinSON" and thought yeah that sounds like a proper escalation for him

Don't say he's mad

I was once telling some people about Tim Robinson and one person said “You mean Tim Robbins???”

Tim Robinson's Skeptical Look from ITYSLALT: Tim Robinson's Skeptical Look from ITYSLstatic.klipy.com

He did not take getting replaced as mayor by Juliette Nichols well

😂

What did he do to get cancelled?

I don’t think he’s criticized Trump or ICE any time recently. Hmmm

Oh goodness, he was on Rogan. Oh well I'm sure for him cancel culture is a bigger deal than ICE agents shooting US citizens on the streets.

Well I can see why he'd be seeking ego death from that starting point

huh, I liked Luke Wilson in Bongwater better 😎

Most divorced-guy avoids-therapy behavior and he wasn't even legally married to Sarandon.

Love to ingest psychedelics while angry.

Oh no. Not Tim Robbins.

Wait? Tim Robbins was canceled?

I burst out laughing for a few moments then looked at what u wrote

Wyd Tim Robbins? I mean, aside from just generally being annoying.

so, *not* one of yours?

A man who was paid to star in a live-action adaptation of Howard the Duck is traumatized by cancel culture?

Somebody needs to remind him that woke is a good thing, maybe the best of things - and no good thing ever dies.

She told him to stop being a whiny baby about cancel culture.

The streets are calling it, “Jacob’s Laddering.”

What did he get cancelled for?

Oh my God he actually said that he regretted trying to tell people to save their lives during covid because now they're all butt hurt and tribal about something so stupid as somebody trying to save your life?? Fuck that moron.

Of course it was on fucking Rogan.

My brain took 4 tries before it accepted this wasn't actually about Tim Heidecker.

This is why Onion writers have the hardest job in the world. Except maybe for underwater welders.

He’s so mad at cancel culture he decided to trip balls?? 😂 Allrighty. I’m more curious how this becomes a story. Did he call someone right after and be like “I got so mad at cancel culture I kissed the sky!” 🤔🤔

Don't fall for Fox. The man is not only not cancelled, he's doing a bang up job for neurodiverse character representation on Silo. Neurodiverse characters can be heroes or villains, as the writing on Silo and Andor shows us.

Wasn't he the biggest target for a decade by Conservatives? Why are they so awesome at this stuff?

men are so emotional

What was he even canceled for?

I was like that in highschool. Any excuse to drop some acid.

This is some Joaquin-Phoenix-I'm-Not-Here bit as he preps for "Bull Durham 2," right?

People talk themselves into some weird shit

Dying: the original cancel culture.

I had no idea he was canceled. Is there a registry I can look at?

Waaaaaaat

I thought he was already high on his own supply?

HOW DID Y’ALL AT THE ONION NOT WRITE THIS

Is this good for the career or not?

I was pissed that they didn’t like me projecting hate so I tripped and cried to my dead mommy about it.

Ayahuasca Tired of Doing Emotional Labor for Tim Robbins

And I lose another round of “The Onion or not The Onion”

I misread this as Tony Robbins

Nobody likes you, Bernard. You deserved everything you got.

Wait what horrible thing was Tim Robbins caught doing that got him "cancelled"?

why is he mad lol was he cancelled?

wtf

Had no idea that Tim Robins was one of those guys

Some accusations about to drop??

His relationship with Susan Sarandon makes so much more sense now.

Jumping on the Robbinson bandwagon

we didnt cancel culture him enough apparently

Anger or anxiety?

So I guess Anger spat him back out then?

What finally broke his brain. The Green Lantern film or the pandemic?

Was he cancelled?

Tim Robbins was canceled? What’d he do?

Why was Tim Robbins canceled? I didn't get the memo

Thought this was about him and got so confused

Get in the bin, Tim. Get in the bin and stay there.

RIP The Onion good run

Does this make Tom Robbins the sane Robbins? That doesn't bode well.

I am about to also💀😂😂😂

Why can't people just say "I was bummed out so I decided to get high?" You don't need a reason to want to get high. Cancel culture? Really? Tim Robbins is about as culturally relevant as a Blackberry phone or a fax machine.

Mad Libs ass headline

Seems appropriate for the Bill Gates guy in Antitrust

If you're upset by Hollywood cancel culture, I'm guessing you have some skeletons.

He’s turned into his character from High Fidelity

Fucking entitled cnt

Who? Is this someone we’re supposed to know or care about? Is it cancel culture if nobody knows who you are and nobody cares?

You ever get upset about a vague concept so much that you put your brain in a DMT atom smasher?

"Fuck you, liberal. I'm gonna go get violently, deliriously sick in the rainforest

🤦🏻‍♀️hope she told him to quit being a whiny asshole

Is this what he felt cancelled for? I didn't even know he was cancelled.

So is Robbins basically MAGA now? I can’t keep track of him (or Susan Sarandon for that matter)

The machine elves didn’t want him hashing their vibe so they sent his mom 🤦‍♂️

hahahahahahaha

What is happening

The FACE I just made

Cancel culture isnt even real. Sure people will yell at you on the internet. But you can still star in big movies, do stand up shows, or be president.

I thought this was another Onion post for a minute

He needs another few months in the hole

Working theory: the lasting effects of COVID is making people have endless cycles of midlife crises.

The machine elves assured him that it was indeed a plandemic

I didn’t even know he was ever canceled, that’s how irrelevant he is he was good in Silo though

Did he get canceled or something?

Bath salts will do that.

Shitting your pants to own the libs

This is very similar to my idea for footloose 2!

Not The Onion?

holy fuck I read this as Tim Robinson and now in dying 🤣

I’m doing the same thing except with PCP

Who canceled Tim Robbins? Isn’t he on a hit Apple show?

He can also breathe through his eyelids

Cancel culture is the worst. I mean, it drove me to start staring at the sun for hours at a time. I can't really see the problem people would have with Tim. I can't really see the problem. I can't really see. Shit.

He should take some advice from his most monstrous character: www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zY5...

Bob Roberts: ComplainYouTube video by gluckschmerzwww.youtube.com

Goddamn Duframe

are we, like, SURE this isn't a sketch bit from the Jim Haggerty Show? Like, has anyone checked?

Between this and Boy George, I have to start getting better at my news headline madlibs

It’s really not all it’s cracked up to be…. Often something people turn to when they don’t know how to open spiritual doors in any other way. I’m not saying that it can’t be helpful…(?) It’s just not what many people think it is, and some people go into long-term trauma during the experience. 🙏

This is when you know you have too much time on your hands.

Was he on Rogan?