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@shitpostsintiaras.bsky.social 👆

I was in a harpsichord accident and Baroque my Bach

how can you tell if an actor is good or just really good at pretending to be an actor?

is this an inception question?

True method actors always get hard nipples, unless their motivation is specifically for them to have flaccid tits.

Saw The Odyssey and loved it but product placement with the Trojan™ horse was questionable.

how can you tell if an actor is good or just really good at pretending to be an actor?

donne: no man is an island! *he leaps to pull off my island disguise, i jump out the window and into street. his partner expects him to pursue, but he smiles and starts ringing a bell* me: who’s that for? who’s that for? *a bus runs me over* partner: but, how did you know? donne: don’t ask *wink*

i work hard and i play hard and i eat hard(jelly beans) and i poop hard(because of the jelly beans)

I cant believe its been a year since hulk hogan stopped saying the n word good for him

I ordered a hot dog from IKEA and the person has only been calling the order numbers for people to pick up but then she called my number and followed with “just a hot dog” and I’m like girl why you gotta blast my business like that

thoughtless thoughts

of course i want ketchup with my fries, how else am i supposed to stay hydrated?

i’m increasing your dosage… of my skeets! heh heh, gotya

sorry i haven’t been posting much recently, but bluesky started enforcing id verification where i live but it’s against my principles to comply and it’s been a pain in the butt because i have to drive across state lines to post my dumb jokes

you have bigger fish to fry? wow, so this poor fish died for no reason and will go to waste because it’s not up to your size standards? so selfish and cruel

you have bigger fish to fry? wow, so this poor fish died for no reason and will go to waste because it’s not up to your size standards? so selfish and cruel

Don't ever ask me if I've watched something. I have never watched anything. I am not even looking at you right now. My eyes are painted on the backs of my eyelids and I have been asleep this whole time.