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grabbing every small business owner I can find by the shoulders and yelling directly into their faces that IF I DON'T HAVE AN INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT I CAN'T SEE ANY OF YOUR SHIT GET A FUCKING WEBSITE

I made a fake account just to look at events in my area. I really dislike that I have to do this

It's shark week. LOOK AT THE SHARK

I've been leaving mine at home when I'm not traveling very far, and yeah. All of this

Top-tier Divorced Guy behavior: thinking your ex-wife is willing to cover and lie for you and not being right about that.

We must be like the inglorious basta'ds and not let them take off their red hats when this is over. They have been pushing for this since 1979.

Maggots

Alex Jones, who has not paid a single cent to the Sandy Hook families despite owing them $1.4 billion, has been in a $3,000 per night suite in Hawaii for the last few weeks illegally using the InfoWars accounts to boost his traffic. Today he said there's going to be a national draft in three weeks.

I didn't know Mammon had staffing for stuff like that

The free market puts sawdust in the bread and children in the mines

Friendly reminder that these things aren't impacted by closing the Strait of Hormuz so maybe, just maybe, we should implement them to avoid being impacted by future conflicts: -Solar panels -Wind turbines -Battery storage -Electric vehicles -Bicycles -Natural fertilizers -Electric heat pumps

kids, i have something exciting to tell you. I just financed a cybertruck through x the everything app. also your mom left

I mean, really. I know people with dementia can hang on for a long time, but he really looks like trash.

Discovering new levels of LinkedIness

The New York Times wouldn't let me write about the Age of Diarrhea so I had to do it myself.

While we are in this Greek Mythology moment, may I remind you that Emma Thompson is adapting Pat Barker’s take on The Iliad, and she’s struggled to get it made bc the focus on what acts of war against women and survival thereafter actually look like (the core of Barker’s narrative) is too intense.

Yeah. As fertilizer

Just amazing that now, in the **United States**, if you’re accosted by an armed and/or masked stranger that might have pulled you over in an unmarked car - by ramming you - you’re supposed to just assume this is law enforcement. WTF

I thought Hawley quit because he was being a pervert?

All jokes aside, was it the brain worm?