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Come on, it's twenty feet, this is agony

I realise that rainclouds must logically have borders, but it is raining on next door's garden and not mine what the FUCK

bought candy at the pool for a 13yo and she tried to give me cash. i was like nahh it's nbd, and she goes "girl i have seen your car." 13yo girls remain undefeated. you think you're talking to a child but you're actually talking to whatever gods used to send to punish mortals for their hubris

so, just to be clear, Trump's corruption is so blatant that even UEFA can't swallow it? (An organisation that has been just fine with FIFA corruption to date.)

My grandmothers: Either a lot of hard domestic labour in some rich twat's house, or being a professional artist! the problem with option 2 being that I can't draw a recognisable stick man, so scrubbing floors it is.

It is putting it mildly to describe these people as a death cult.

Just saw someone post re: Emily Wilson "is this the most discourse ever caused by a translator?", and felt the misty ghost of James "Ossian" Macpherson rise enraged from a pool in Morvern

++BREAKING++ The UK and Spanish governments have issued a joint statement overnight: "[We] agreed that this summer’s wildfires demonstrated that climate change was now a national security emergency facing Europe and threatening our way of life." www.gov.uk/government/n...

rather, I am going to prove my AI-free human authorship by being so fucking late delivering the next MS, it will make your eyes bleed. Take that sloppers.

and I do mean that. If a publisher asked me to put "Human Authored" on my cover I would refuse. I think offering a meaningless certification that will be used by liars is a bad idea and I am not going to participate in such a system or be used as proof of its validity.

Obv a lot of sloppers will use a Human Authored badge as part of their author cosplay. I also expect some big names will be too embarrassed or delusional to admit they're not entitled to use it, and get caught out. I'm just not touching it.

Of course loads of people who put 'Human Authored' on their books will be telling the absolute truth! But loads more people who use that badge will be liars who either don't care, or actually believe that typing prompts and copy pasting is authorship. This well comes pre-poisoned.

IMO the Authors Guild and Society of Authors should withdraw these ill conceived schemes now, rather than quietly in six months after the reputational damage has been done.

Saying it again: Any "Human Authored" self-certification honesty scheme is bound to fail, because people who use the slop generator to "write books" are by definition dishonest.

An excellent thread on special editions, but holy wow, this line: "Sales are what romance gets *instead* of importance." YEP

Shout out to the man on the train calling his bank about ID theft and who has read his name, postcode, and the long number on his card to the whole carriage.

My garage has found a new solution to the problem of an appropriate gender-neutral salutation that works for all customers. It's 'Legend'. All communications start "Hello, you absolute legend." I mean, it's no less or more sincere than 'valued customer'.

Guys, I got a book club email that I actually think is real. It may be we are truly approaching the singularity. It may be that I've just lost my mind

A wren once chased my cat the whole length of the garden. I mean he was running for his *life*, pursued by a tiny ball of toxic fluff screaming bird obscenities.

Old and busted: "It's not just X—it's Y!" New hotness: "It's not just X—it's the inconceivable yet terrifying splendour of the austere mountain peaks thickly wooded with dense thorn in which wolves yet might pass unnoticed [cont for 52 pages]!"