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"I witnessed a Cleveland playoff lost first-hand" like he's a war photographer or something. "THEY WERE JUST BOYS."

X Money? Oh you mean alimony!! Yeah I pay a ton

Diving isn't really about "catching" the "ball." It's about showing coach you'll go all out on every play, even the ones you totally fuck up

Great company

Team's struggling, but a Phillies game really only comes down to a few key factors: Did they hit a lot of home runs Did any of their players have to field the ball Did they have to throw the ball anywhere at any time Did anyone run the bases backwards on purpose

PREGAME: The Phillies just need to clean it up and play as well as they know they can FIRST INNING: The Phillies all tried to field the same grounder and are now a jumbled mass of limbs and flesh, rolling around the infield. Trea Turner chucked the ball into the broadcast booth

Maybe if Girardi was as good at managing as he is at noticing ties he wouldn't be sitting in the booth 🤷‍♂️

trash

look how they massacred our boy

Im on temple campus rn and a young Black man wearing a Sixers jersey was walking around announcing it like the town crier

Are we gonna get LeBron in the booth with John Kruk?

DO NOT SELL THE SIMMONS/CASTELLANOS HOUSE TO LEBRON

Seeing some posts like "Shohei Ohtani is just an obvious oaf who has no idea where he is" but idk he always seems to be blundering into gambling scandals or hanging out with fascists never into like a soup kitchen or a BLM protest or whatever it's a weird coincidence

This is so fucking insane

ALEX CORA: So we all get the scheme right BOHM: Yep STOTT: Yep MARSH [Eating Doritos from trash can]: Yep REALMUTO: [In a dead sprint toward a wall] HARPER: What up Youtube this is the "draft king" himself Bryce Harper with a $5 initial wager and up to $1,000 in Bet Reset tokens for 5 days

At least Alex Cora would have these Phillies really hitting their stride with some cheating scheme right now. Nah they'd screw it up

REF FROM AIR BUD: Ain't no rule that says a man can't go from third to second base! UMP: Yeah but he was tagged out though REF: Oh UMP: Yeah REF: ... UMP: ... REF: Kind of a ... UMP: Dumb play yeah

PHILADELPHIA—Phillies manager Don Mattingly tells his base runners to stay on the field on the off chance what they've just done is so stupid that there technically isn't a rule for it.

You are all being so mean, the Phillies just think a little differently from the other boys.