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That was a BIG win.

These Orioles may be vexing, but they have a lot of fight in them, and they’re finding ways to score runs despite important players like Adley, Basallo, and Westburg on the bench. What more do you need to see, Mike Elias? Be as committed as your players. BUY!

The chorus to “Kid Charlemagne” by Steely Dan popped into my head, am I having a stroke

This morning I dreamt I was eating a sandwich that was, from bottom to top, the lower muffin, egg, and sausage of an Egg McMuffin, fried chicken breast in the middle, capped with the top patty and bun of a Big Mac. Reader, I tell you: this was gross. Not real, but still, don’t try it or dream it.

It might even make a likeness of you based on an actual photograph, but that somehow turns you into a manosphere podcaster-looking chud. Ask me how I know.

Finally, I’ll learn how to cook all the roadkill meats

Can confirm. Having spent actual decades in the animation business, it is very much a “time to make the donuts” industry, just with art instead of donuts. (Although sometimes there are donuts.)

If only that 66% who finally came to the conclusion Trump puts himself over the country had recognized that before the election. It was true and obvious in his first term and after. But he’s no longer trying to hide his corruption—it’s right out in the open. Hope your plans keep backfiring, Don.

There’s no universe where this cowardly fascist wouldn’t plead the Fifth if he needed to.

I can’t wait to wish for no generative AI, that’ll “broadly benefit humanity.” I’m sure Sam Altman’s magic genie will grant that wish. Right, Sam? Right?!?

Somebody recommend my book to President Obama.

Well this is a first. I did a podcast interview for my book yesterday and the podcaster, who got my headshot from the PR company my publisher hired, used an AI rendering of me and the cover of the book — which he redesigned! — instead of the actual photo and book cover. What?!? Why?!?

Apparently you can win despite committing three errors, in extra innings and if you can survive long enough to get past Skubal. I stand corrected.

The Orioles are really vexing me right now. You can’t win committing three errors in a game! Especially when you can’t hit against a guy like Skubal. And I read this morning they’re willing to trade Cowser, their best defensive player, not to mention a fan favorite. Don’t do it, Orioles.

What are five things in your upcoming release? Aliens 👾 Spaceships 🚀 Coffee ☕️ An unhappy thief An unhappy space cop Bonus thing: Chemistry (the sexy kind)

This is great:

This is pure grift. Not even a good one. But apparently people are so desperate for a genie they keep giving him money. C’mon, people, at least make him work for it.

There are so many em-dashes in Into the Great—so many—and I put them all in with great love and care and an absolute refusal to make different grammar choices because of AI. Anyway, you can pre-order my 100% human written, edited, and designed book here: lilfac.com/shop/ws-/pro...

Ah, yes, the true victims of the pandemic: not the million people who died here in the U.S. (something we have failed to reckon with), but the people who were wailing about being asked to wear masks and peddling ivermectin. They’re the ones who really need an apology.

No place for this kind of language or behavior in the Senate, but since I’m not a senator or testifying before Congress, fuck this guy.