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Or, you could just go fuck yourselves.

Are you doing anything for Shark Week? A yearly soulless money making exercise from a bunch of grasping corporate cunts, soon to be bought over by even bigger right-wing cunts. Exploiting sharks and exploiting viewers with shite populist garage. Science for people who clap when the plane lands.

Lindsey Graham was only 71? I didn’t know Senators could be that young.

“Lindsey Graham taught me that it was okay to be dead.” - Mitch McConnell

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The mayor of Minneapolis’ penis is a tiny clawlike hand

Gilmore Girls is leaving Netflix today. That sucks, but at least now the Louis C.K. standup special won’t be able to jack-off in front of it.

Now THIS is how you write an Alan Greenspan obituary.

hey quick question, am I having a stroke

“Come on, Boomers, stop pushing old back & white movies on us. What possible relevance could an antique like Citizen Kane have on the modern world?”

'vanilla ice congratulations u are the opening act and your planned set is 10 minutes but we are sure the 30 minutes you are set to perform will be appreciated for the entire 45 minutes also congratulations u are the closing act"

hard to exaggerate how heroic these men were. they likely saved dozens of children's lives. www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...

*patriotic respiratory failure noises*

Declaration of Principles: I will continue to stand up for my constitutional right to not give a single shit about anything Tucker Carlson might have to say.

Dude 😭😂

At the present moment I am not interested in anything politically beyond the destruction of the Republican Party as a viable political force. If we don't break the back of the conservative movement nothing else really matters. Whatever good shit you want to do won't happen.

Goddamnit, Cezary

This is the way. Now if only I can follow suit…