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Intercepted from The White House: Susie, The President wants Kash Patel to put E. Jean Carroll on the FBI Most Wanted List with a shoot to kill order.

Breaking Future News: Russia's 'Wildberries' Changes Name To 'Killedburied' After Ukraine Attacks

Yokai of the Day: Kinko--These kitsune (fox spirits) take the form of dice cups used in the gambling dice game of chō-han. The cups have fox-like eyes, legs, and a tail, and two wing-like limbs like the cards used in the game oicho-kabu. They eat money and clothes. yokai.com/kinko-forbid...

Military spending is never having to say 'stay on budget'!

Trump's lawyers are as feckless at winning court cases as Hitler's scientists were for developing the Bomb! Both: "Maybe we shouldn't have expelled all the competent people?!?"

Trump: "We cannot abandon gas, coal and oil. It would be a complete disaster!" The Rest Of Us: "Electricity produced from solar, wind and water power sources that don't pollute the environment and won't end up condemning my grandchildren to live underground to escape 150 degree days? Sign me up!"

Nopify Shopify!

Expanding the war to other countries always works! Just ask Nixon! www.theguardian.com/world/2026/j...

US-Saudi strikes in Iraq push region into ‘uncharted territory’, analysts warnRiyadh’s decision to join US in strikes on Iran-backed militia further complicates widening and ‘unpredictable’ warwww.theguardian.com

Yay! Another first from Elon Musk! boingboing.net/2026/07/29/t...

Tesla Cybertruck overtakes Ford Edsel as "biggest flop" in U.S. auto historyTesla sells a few hundred Cybertrucks a month to human beings, maybe. It's the biggest flop in U.S. automotive history, outflopping even the legendary Ford Edsel. Summarizing a paywalled report…boingboing.net

Arguing over an adaptation of the Odyssey is a First World problem!

Get ready for another Big Suck, one to vacuum up all the money and the other to leave behind another Freedom 250/Kennedy Center/Reflecting Pool/White House East Wing/Willie Wonka Chocolate Experience money pit! www.nbcnews.com/politics/don...

Trump announces plans for sprawling Dulles Airport makeoverThe plans include redoing two the concourses and the removal of the airport’s aging shuttles known as “people movers.”www.nbcnews.com

Intercepted from The White House: Susie, Could you have Mike Lindell sent a few more pillows to the President? He keeps beating the stuffing out of them every time he has a crying fit over Iran!

Breaking Future News: Kevin Warsh At Wall Street Fall: "Garsh!"

More people believe in ghosts (39%) and aliens visiting Earth (47%) than believe Trump should still be president (34%)!

There's a raging pandemic of measles, screwworms and exploding diarrhea now, and the Senate has time to criticize someone who did a pretty good job six years ago to justify their old conspiracy theories. And they wonder why people want to abolish the Senate!

Some swear up and down that Trump Derangement Syndrome exists but that AI psychosis is completely imaginary!

Elon Musk: "It's not plummeting like a meteor! It's plummeting like a magnificent hawk hit by a plummeting meteor!

Breaking Future News: Psychics Say Leto Days Away From Fundamentalist Christian Conversion

So, they can afford an expensive robot but not afford a volunteer program or some teacher aides?!

The Oligarch Apologist: "No, you cannot have good things, much less good or things because...AI!"