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All the candid photos of me and Brando are like a medieval painting entitled The Maiden Et Le Weasel-Boye.

After 20 years together, Partner and I have got engaged. This is what happens when two people who aren't very good at keeping track of time decide to join forces. Partner is private, so here's me and Brando instead.

Us: Wow, this is so Victorian. The Victorians: Wow, this is so Hogarthian.

I am so psyched for this.

Caught sight of my back in the mirror, and after twelve weeks of swimming physio I've developed muscles like wot a normal person has. Very gratifying as I started swimming to stop my shoulders roaming out of their sockets while I sleep.

Found myself getting emotional over the Yarmouth winter garden, because it's so classically Victorian to say "I want a greenhouse big enough for two thousand people, and there had BETTER be a cloakroom".

Wistfully thinking about books of court proceedings being bound in the guilty party's skin. Because of reasons.

My nan's aunt used to bring frogs in from the garden and sew them tiny outfits to wear. She also once ran up to my nan's car and thrust a crumpled piece of paper through the window at my (then a child) mum. It was a photo of shirtless Tom Jones. "Wehay!" she said, then ran off again.

The sky shivers; you don't give up. www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wvgi...

Witch Club Satan - You Wildflower (Official Music Video)YouTube video by Witch Club Satanwww.youtube.com

As the Liberty lads o’er the sea Bought their freedom, and cheaply, with blood, So we, boys, we Will die fighting, or live free, And down with all kings but King Ludd!

This was a *horrible* one. I want to fistfight that thing. How dare you go after that nice young man, you spindly, amorphous twat? www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/epis...

Uncanny - Series 2: 3. Shadow ManDanny Robins meets Julian in one of the most frightening cases he’s ever investigated: a young man tormented by a terrifying shadow figure. But were the events truly supernatural?www.bbc.co.uk

I do want to reprint Pseudotooth one day, and i do have vague plans for illustrations and extra bits in the back. Publishers who deal with reprints are pretty few and far between, but it's a weird, weird book, and I think we need more weird out there. Maybe if I win the lottery.

Someone keeps putting their newspaper in our plastic recycling bin so the council refuse to collect it, and when I find this person I will be converting them into biofuel.