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late 90’s there was an oddities store in town with a fri. night public access show. these dudes had chemicals rushing thru their bloodstream trying to sell a bunch of crap you could call-in and be like, “put that lampshade on your head and i’ll buy it” and once they did, we’d hang up and high-five

friday night lights

did anybody hear they are turning The Odyssey into a film?

i remember this building when i was a kid. it was pretty run down before they tore it down, wish someone would have fixed it up sounds like the upstairs ballroom was quite the hot spot in the early days

did we ever figure out if guy from the strokes natural voice just slips in-and-out of auto-tune? we need to get to the bottom of this

bug spray guy just said, “you’re one of only like seven guy friends i have” and that breaks my heart dude because we only chat once a quarter for about ten minutes

i had triple hernia surgery in 2009 that i suspect might be failing and it was at this hospital

in college we did ‘guttenberg sundays’ where we sat around all day watching guttenberg films, nursing hangovers i don’t drink anymore, but i probably still have the dvds #GuttenbergSundays

i have a family of finches living in my back yard for the last 5 or 6 years, multiple generations, and they collect up dormant bermuda grass that looks just like this to build nests

if ai is so great we should use it as a politician lie detector. every time they lie to us their rating gets dinged a little bit. anytime it falls below a certain threshold they are eligible for a snap recall election. let the people decide if they get to stay

in bloom 🌱

abs replay challenge in baseball is short for ‘a buncha shit’ replay so you can see if it was a buncha shit or not

went to the bonsai shop and only bought two pots. the restraint shown was medal worthy

seeing these images from Lindsey Graham’s funeral is a real good reminder that he’s deader than shit

price of my dental cleaning went up thirty bucks and i’m gonna attribute it directly to that sloppy loser bitch donald trump

fruit on the bottom aka we are too cheap to buy another mixing machine

smokin’ on haaaaayyy in the middle of the barnnnnnn

guy keeps singing “i’d like to buy america a coke” shut up and do it already, we’ve been ready