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With razor wire on the inside.

Or Olympic canoeists.

Oh no! Anyway, moving on.

Ah, that's very sad, he was unique and very funny. His appearance on RHLSTP was brilliant. RIP, Finny Man.

My reply.... Wordle 1,871 4/6* 🟩⬛⬛⬛🟩 🟩⬛⬛⬛🟩 🟩⬛🟩🟨🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Morning! "Thank you all for coming to my TED squak"

You're i(deliberately?) Ignoring the fact that sarcasm hasn't upped its game mechanics in centuries. Embrace the LOLZ of the new, "Mr Funny Man". (Did i do it right? Did I? Huh?)

5. Alternatively, we send Alister Heath to cover the Mediterranean beat for a few... decades. He'd love the self-cooking paella and pavement-roasted bacon butties.

94 Years of Hurt

FIFA should retrospectively apply VAR to this result. And sanction Russia for not paying attention, then doing a homer to cover it up. Congrats, West Germany.

Chamomile? The kettle's been boiling for a while, looks like.

The atmosphere on Sigma IX is more life-supportive - despite it being 87.4% carbon monoxide.

Alongside the cuddies? Take aipples and mind they don't roll over on you.

To be fair, the Count's support team were beamed in from Sigma IX which is even further away than Prestatyn.

That's the portrait in Richard Osman's attic, right?

TBF, his ass does look great in them tweed and viscose shorts, and his haemorrhoid treatment recommendstions are always very effective.

That's mayonaise. I work in a deli and steal stuff.

My pants are haunted.

Punishment is... stocks, rotten fruit, effluent drained from rivers and seas etc. - until we get bored if it.

Ousting, eh? Yeah, there's way too much ousting going on round these parts. Stoppit.