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Do you need an easier way to book a doctor's appointment? Well it's not Zocdoc because you're outside the US so just sit through the next year of YouTube sponsorships in boredom like a good little capitalist pinata.

My recent quest to find a movie as goofy-fun as the D&D movie: MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE: this movie gets it. Good, dumb fun. 8/10. MORTAL KOMBAT II: this movie knows it should get it but struggled. 6/10. MANDALORIAN AND GROGLET: "No, use the 'Piss Yellow' colour grading setting." Snore. DNF/10.

I was today years old when I learned that most Americans can't read 24h time. There's a very simple trick I can share to help you migrate: if the hours are over 12, subtract 12 from them and call it PM. So 15:35 -> 3:35 PM. There. Now you can buy a Casio.

I have all the acronyms. PTSD. Pet Tummy-Snuggling Disorder. ADHD. Adorable Dog-Hugging Disorder. OCD. Obsessive Cat picture-Dumping.

Are there any words you deliberately misspell because you prefer your spelling? I like berzerk. Feels better than "berserk".

Everyone is entitled to basic human rights. Except you, Jeremy. You get nothing and you know why.

Monthly reminder that if you don't like a piece of art, you have full permission to just not say anything. You absolutely do not need to post "I don't like this" on everything you don't like. Nobody cares. Not everything is about you, nor should it be. Learn to exist alongside difference, dickhead.

Today, on the Irritating Wordplay podcast, we're asking: was Patroclus a Homersexual?

1km PB tonight. Running instead of writing is a decent substitute.

Who are your favourite authors writing horse porn on SoFurry these days?

In this thesis I will show that Dante's Inferno is proof that Renaissance people only had nine fingers.

If I follow you and you happen to have some small TG group with a high signal:noise ratio with interesting folk in it, do let me know.

It's not well-known, but thousands of twink horses are harvested every day just to give you your tasty breakfast. It's immoral and it has to stop. #SaveHorseButtholes

It'll be fine. www.onlyflares.com/blog/an-upda...

An update on my healthJust some info about what's going on with me.www.onlyflares.com

I want two pony players to pull me along on a sled with runners shaped like horsecocks. And when we stop, I press a button and the runners squirt an indeterminately viscous fluid over the ponies. And then the pony boys fuck.

If we don't get a scene, however brief, of Paul foreseeing Worm Leto then I will be writing an unbelievably harsh letter to the Screen Actors Guild, proposing the reinstatement of tarring and feathering.