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I wish he would wear a mask. A really tight one that prevented him from opening his mouth and spreading his disease.

When setting a default name for the PDFs your customers download for their records, maybe try to find a Goldilocks zone between Mercury ("getPDF.pdf" for every file) and the Oort Cloud ([64 hex digits guaranteed unique across the universe, and utterly meaningless to humans].pdf)

It's my fault for having eyes.

I want to call this Fro-tage like Farage 😂

You went for a Burrata whereas he was clearly looking for a crumpet.

Welllllll you're never going to lose your keys. 😜

We only rate dogs. This is a bed bug. She's very cute, and we actually wouldn't mind an infestation of this particular bed bug. But please only send dogs. Thank you... 12/10 (TT: lekik25)

I've just realised the company slogan of my walkie talkies is "We are together" which completely defeats the point of walkies 😂

Left brain: I'm really liking all the music YouTube Music has chosen for me tonight. Right brain: You're literally listening to the "Liked Songs" playlist. 😑

Sandra can you open the [freakin] door we kinda got a situation out here..

Love this for him

‘If Nigel Farage wants to apologise for all the times that he’s put other people in danger, then I’ll be happy to make an apology’ - Zack Polanski

Just spotted this. It's misleading and unnecessary, who eats 5/6th of a bag?

In 1952, Alan Turing was prosecuted for 'gross indecency' after admitting to a sexual relationship with another man, which was a criminal offence in the UK at the time under laws dating back to the Criminal Law Amendment Act of 1885. 🧵 www.thepinknews.com/2026/07/29/a...

Of course it is; it's t'up north! [I'm originally from Lancashire, but don't tell t'nobody]

Today's moment of zen: Science is the vaccine for against stupidity.

Please refrain from insults. The numbers were from Interpol covering Europe only.

I'm starting to wonder if AI has killed Instagram.