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Emergency Siren 🔈

Only improvable with a little trail of blue and yellow smoke and a victory roll before diving in. Next version, maybe.

It's fascinating watching a road warrior bobbing and weaving between lanes in a desperate attempt to get ahead. Also, that feeling of zen calm as your own lane temporarily speeds up and you pass said bobber, stuck in the next lane. Give him a smile: he'll hate it. It all works itself out, just relax

It was the bobbing Adam's Apple and audible gulping that gave him away

Hearts of Oak! Nerves of steel Nob of butter...

The BBC have a whole programme, hosted by @aiannucci.bsky.social , called STRONG MESSAGE HERE based on an actual occurrence of a politician reading off autocue.

The Gulp War.

A suspiciously sticky BOSS phone.

The Bottom Inspectors was supposed to be Viz's biting (teehee) satire of Newcastle traffic wardens, not a feckin' job spec for an increasingly marbles-deficient author.

Nigel Soprano "Woke up this morning. Got yourself a gun. Mama always said you'd be The Chosen One"

In the name of all that's humane, NOOOOO!!!

As if he... oh...

<ahem>

G1: 'Well you replied to the advert' G2: 'I thought it said "involves a little light housekeeping"' G3: 'So what did it actually say?' G2: '"A little lighthouse keeping"' Been obsessed with puns and wordplay ever since. All thanks to The Goodies (and '...Clue'). RIP Bill. Say 'Hi' to Tim for us.

I remember being almost sick with excitement waiting for the Kitten Kong episode to come on. Only almost rivalled by the diggers turning into snapping dinosaurs before chasing them around. One of my favourite Goodies jokes was them grumpily being stuck in a lighthouse: /...

So 13% of police forces won't sign up to anti-racist commitments? <gulp> He's got a point <gulp> hasn't he? <gulp> We have got a <gulp>problem. Oh. That's not it?

There is a firm that can provide a car park charging station all off the back of a pantechnicon. It unfolds into 12 bays with overhead panels, batteries. Needs access to hefty mains so it's not self contained, but is just one of a range of possible solutions, but we need an overall strategy.

Perhaps the now-reported freezing of Reform's bank account during last election wasn't enough of a clue for him. And he *is* The Establishment. From his shiny shoes, smart suit, double-cuff shirts with cufflinks, chiselled jaw and connected girlfriend, he is the model of a modern major right-winger.

Which, if we followed the French system, would be under a solar-panelled canopy. Cue another faux-outrage.

The calm tones of either Michal Hussain, @rostaylor.bsky.social , or Sarah Montague but, knowing my luck, I'd get a highly caffeinated @youngvulgarian.marieleconte.com ! 😉☕️☕️