Профиль

Oh look, you found a hidden easter egg!* *cooter biscuit

Dairy-free is not someone telling you there is free dairy. Learn from my mistakes.

Dairy-free is not someone telling you there is free dairy. Learn from my mistakes.

Oh look, you found a hidden easter egg!* *cooter biscuit

What if I told you this account was actually just Lin-Manuel Miranda workshopping ideas for a pop punk version of Hamilton?

I’m still punk, I tell myself as I check my sleep score every morning.

“Fuck a clown and find out.” - Weird dude in storm drain.

Maybe if you change lanes a couple dozen more times the bumper to bumper traffic will magically disappear.

Did anyone try looking in the Epstein File Cabinet?

Quick question: how long does it take for the lettuce to start working?

I’m a New Jersey success story.* *I’ve never set foot in New Jersey.