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I'm going to make a Wally George sculpture out of Pez and list it for $101,000

Elon is right, I've read The Odyssey and Helen is specifically described as a white woman with blonde hair, dark roots, 32DD silicone breasts, a lower back tattoo of Dale Earnhardt, and who cums at the sight of a doughy trust fund kid.

if Frank Burns and Doug Neidermeyer had a kid

I'll believe Mitch McConnell is really alive when he performs Puttin' On the Ritz with Gene Wilder

BREAKING: The Strait of Hormuz and Canal of Lindsey Graham are closed

RIP Lindsey Graham: 5/3/16 5:02PM - 5/3/16 5:03PM

TODAYS SCOTUS RULING: the president is definitely a rapist and let's give him more executive power

wow, the line at Lindsey Graham's Great American Glory Hole must be really long

Reflecting Pool Algae Update:

Видео

the Iran deal is so unpopular analysts predict it'll take at least 3 fake assassination attempts and a zombie squirrel invasion for Trump to cancel the midterms

every FOX News reporter today

everything with Trump is staged optics. He wanted to sign the Iran peace deal today so he could announce it tonight at the 250th celebration and pretend like he and he alone saved our country from nuclear destruction. the saddest part is his followers are such rubes they would have believed it

wow, did a young Lindsey Graham just blow Mr. Strickland at the Enchantment Under the Sea Dance?

Happy Shoeshine Day

NBA is rigged! when Spurs had 29 point lead the game should have been immediately stopped and Spurs declared winner. Instead officials decides to play "4th quarter?" and Knicks "somehow" score enough baskets to win. Fraud!

Obama should sit courtside for Game 4. No bulletproof glass, no napping. He'd get a 10 minute standing ovation. Players from each team would hug him. It'd send Trump into such a violent rage he'd choke to death on a Filet 'O Fish

haven't heard New Yorkers boo a politician this badly since the mayor from Taking of Pelham 123

voting to once again keep a reality star megalomaniac buffoon out of public office. my 9th grade Civics teacher who could recite every Schoolhouse Rock song and Monty Python sketch would be proud

I TOLD you going to jail for me and ruining your life would pay off. Enjoy this gold-painted Radio Shack Flip Phone, J6ers!

he's not building a ballroom, he's building a tomb. when he dies he'll be displayed there like Vladimir Lenin, his grotesque corpse preserved as a monument to himself, forever adjoined to the most powerful and important structure in our nation like an inoperable tumor