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I would

I’m being recommended such things

This is really a post for Cohost. It’s a silly bit taken too far that wants riffing. It is not at home on a serious-faced clout chasing “platform” like Medium but I don’t have another place to put it.

Sure. Alright. medium.com/@matthewseij...

I cannot participate in the “weird accomplishments” prompt because I have never accomplished anything weird

FIFA is short for Final Fantasy

The ancient prophecy didn’t foretell nothin. Fuck

There should be kawaiikochans but for German

A couple weeks ago I was riding Link light rail in the late morning and a wiry guy boarded carrying nothing except a quart of Signature Select vanilla ice cream. As the train started moving again he got a credit card out of his wallet and began to use it to shovel ice cream into his mouth

[thinking through the world timeline of France-England conflict and competition in order to make some kind of historically-based wisecrack] Yeah, I dunno. Whatever

I have a joke originally told to me by King Tantalus and I think you’ll agree he was really cooking with this one!

(more measured Talking Heads voice) Similar to how it sometimes was

After some careful study over the past few weeks I put together some failure scenarios for football (soccer): - Should have kicked ball, but didn’t - Should not have kicked ball, but did - Kicked ball, but ball didn’t go where it was supposed to There may be more but this is what I have so far

I am from the future where intelligence is a cheap commodity. Everyone is soooo smart

PLEASE call it that

Everyone made fun of the Softbank goose that lays golden eggs presentation but you can see why such ideas may be novel in some circles

Lately, there’s been a lot of worry over game discs. But did you know there’s one disc that will never let you down? That’s right: I’m talking about Aten, the disc of the sun— the only god you’ll ever need to worship.

@flangy.bsky.social How about the official Seattle Mariners Hot Dogs from Heaven hat

I don’t know what any of you are talking about but ok

LinkedIn has a feature where you draw a squiggly line and then it says “You are smarter than 95% of CEOs”