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babes only want one thing:

having “the talk” with my kids about The Steve Miller Band

my gazebo is a Stand Your Ground state

*haley Stevens voice* the world is a vampire

dennis the deadass

it’s going to be shocking when future scholarship reveals just how many guys in this era used Ultras

Christopher Swollen’s The Bodyssey 💪

u failed this

i will be coptering to work in Hammond

i don’t think Tom Brady should fight TV’s The Good Doctor. even for charity

Bluesky stands on business. it also has The Juice, whether it’s for the purpose of Getting Loose or otherwise

i’ve been drained of PUS (Protected Unc Status)

TRIAL OF DEADPOOL Deadpool: *something ribald* Prosecutor: objection, your honor! the defendant clearly doesn’t care whose toes he steps on

Penelope should smile more

get thee to a jimothy

cool kids on the internet HATE THIS. bc it sounds like Michigan

beat the heat with a 1000-year cryogenic freeze!

🫡 to this man on house hunters international. he can’t wait to maniacally laugh as he ties u to railroad tracks

hot eats, coastal elites