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thank you for laying down the law

(SFX: scary organ music)

you may not.

this tiny dog has achieved complete ownership of the chair

bandit!

(hurriedly applying my Salve of Dreadwife Attraction) one sec everyone I'm almost ready

out of view, he has a tattoo that just says SHOOT MY DICK OFF on one leg and I WOULDN'T MIND on the other

like an isekai situation

what if you WERE Bill Simmons though

with extra poison I'm going tostadas ten outta ten times

how much poison on the tostadas

you're correct

(extremely deranged person voice) can I interest you in getting... Pirates Fever??

... >:(

there's no they here. I'm in charge of what happens in my imagination

what if instead of cube rails it was cute rails and it was about lesbians