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A lone probe made of metals not found in our solar system is found orbiting the dark side of the moon. Broadcasting the same message on repeat for hundreds of years… People of earth, eat a dick.

Being autistic is often described as feeling like an alien socially and culturally. Being really fat also feels like living in an alien society. Because you’re living in a world built for people with very different bodies than your own. Aliens would at least try to do something about this though.

I just woke up from a dream where a prominent point of discussion was the well agreed upon term for a nonbinary child of one of your siblings. Nog. As in nieces, nephews, and nogs.

My belly is hanging out of all my biggest shirts, my thighs and fat pad have grown so much it’s getting noticably harder to walk, shuffling sideways through narrow doorways is getting harder. I haven’t unboxed my new 1,100 pound capacity livestock scale yet. But I know I’m fatter.

Huffing and puffing to put on my diabetic socks with the grippies on the bottom for extra traction. Dropping one on the ground and cursing god before I reach over for my grabber so I can pick it up off the floor. Being this fat is a struggle.

When your gait has to adjust to accommodate your fatpad it’s probably a sign that you’ve been eating a lot of acorns this summer

I’ve already been spoiled by having a power chair. Now anytime I have to walk I’m inevitably thinking about how this could have been done on wheels. Truly the “this could have been an email” of mobility struggles.

Imagine if someone focused all their energies on fattening me till I’m a permanently bedbound pile of blubber. And then they just didn’t stop and kept growing me. I’m already so good at fattening up on my own. With a dedicated feeder I’d be beyond massive incredibly quickly.

Trying to find shirts big enough to cover my belly is becoming an epic quest. Just finding ones that come in 10XL is a struggle of its own. The public at large is going to have to get real cool with seeing all this dough real fast.