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feel like Lynch would have eventually cast Carson Daly.

my money's on a fake AF assassination attempt on Halloween

how's the price of everyone's eggs?

how do I tell my family I have a crush on Susan Collins?

The NBA Finals ✅ Lady G Funeral ✅ WH Correspondents’ Dinner ✅ Pope Funeral ✅ Memorial Day Ceremony ✅ UFC/Birthday Party Event ✅ World Cup Final ✅ Unreal.

can you sue Letterboxd for making you lose respect for everyone you know?

I never thought it would end up being the dorks, but here we are...

don’t ever change, Nextdoor

LeBron: (ties shoes) Every announcer: Unbelievable. Year 24. Wow.

to the eBay freak who woke up at 3:30am on a Sunday to outbid me… I hope RoboCop 2 on Blu Ray is the thing that finally solves you

going to tell my landlord that August rent is a conspiracy

"I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy".

inheriting my father's sigh which contains all the pain and suffering of the shtetl.

Jimothy has begun prank calling my house great job everyone

I can confidently say that my diminished pay raise is one of the best things that ever happened to me...