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just got "the Semtex of blowjobs" by a girl with blue hair and piercings named Orbital VSAT

10 years ago girls used to have names like Tamberlyn and Legumantha and now in 2026 girls are all named shit like Enemy Lodestar and Hunter Killer Drone Ready For Deployment. you ever notice this? i walk down the street and see a gorgeous woman and she says her name is VTOL Gunship

its so funny that undertaIe puts me in middlespace because I played it as a late teenager, but deItarune puts me in littlespace because I love my friends and I clap like a happy excited infant to see 🍎 and 🟪🪓 and 💚. like UT is "woah.. this epic indie game.." to me but DR is YAY MY HAPPY BABY CARTOON

imagine logging in one day and seeing Yung Lean 🔜 MFF

whatda hell lois you only got 2 tickets to charli xcx but youre bringing chris, not me? "im sory petah but this is what you get for calling her 'the boom clap girl' in front of my friends. come on chris" "next level charli dad"

my life is nothing compared to john and his birthday boulder

babble rabbit...... Wouldnt....... SAY THAT!!! *my psychic powers push everything in the room away and up the walls* .....but thats what makes it HORNY!!!!!!!! *my psychic powers retrieve every item and places them back where they were & also a candlelit dinner with embroidered tablecloth is set*

hi :3 👋 its me. youre all in danger ↖️never get invited cause im such a hater got my finger on the detonator 💥👏 crazy girl shit LETS GO BABYFURS

its alright to just admit that im the fantasy... 💙 youre obsessing, just confess it 'cause its obvious- IM YOUR #️⃣1️⃣ IM YOUR #️⃣1️⃣ IM YOUR #️⃣1️⃣ YEAH IM JUST LIVIN THAT LIFE 💅

had a dream last night i was at the county fair. someone in the crowd said "attaboy thats my jeremy!" and i randomly blurt out "thats my JARONA" but someone else standing directly behind me said THE EXACT SAME THING AT THE SAME TIME. we just stopped and looked into each others eyes for a long time

AUGUST 2026 LIFE PLAN: •FUCK AROUND •FIND OUT •ACT LIKE A THEY/THEM •SMOKE LIKE A HE/HIM •LOOK LIKE A SHE/HER •PARTY LIKE A XE/XIM