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Barry Heneghan was telling some patriots on Facebook last week that the reason he hadn't attended the protests at the former Crown Paints factory in Coolock was because he didn't represent the area at the time ... All things to all men.

Keep it Northside.

#clactonbyelection Mr Fish Finger has only just come to my attention. Real name reportedly Paul Ellis, a site engineer from Doncaster who dresses as a rectangular piece of breaded fish ... he said his message in the by-election would be: "Say tartare to Nige. You'll Findus much better."

And you thought it couldn't get any worse than the Hooley in the Sun. 2,000 Country & Irish fans on a Mediterranean cruise.

I don't know how they can play in that heat. It's all I can do to stumble to the fridge for another glass of rosé.

Darina Allen "Choosing an oven is as important as choosing a life partner". An unfortunate turn of phrase.

Farage going to let his constituents decide. Shades of Michael Lowry.

Is Marine Le Pen going to steal Nige's thunder?

As God made them, he matched them.