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Why am I so quiet? I talk to myself enough I'm exhausted

I'm not a safe space I'm a tomb of uncertainty

I painted my toenails before I went swimming at the lake today and was nervous the whole time that fish would like all the sparkles and bite them

Bras are the equivalent to the storage capacity of a squirrels cheeks

Caulking the windowsill with peanut butter to ward off people allergic to peanut butter

Put away my laundry? I am not bound to the confines of mortal trivialities

I'm the chill you get down your spine in the dead of night because I'd hate it if you had to face anything all alone

Well jeez it appears I've struck a nerve (me as a surgeon)

You ever just try to kiss a frog? Just to see?

I like keeping the bedbugs at an agreeable temperature

A man out did me cutting up a cantaloupe today

The shame I feel when I rip the sanitary paper on exam tables at the doctor

Sorry, I haven't hit my quota of doing nothing yet

When he gives me his card and whispers "go buy some books"

Give me 4 versions of you

Honoring our love by gifting you my precious gas station treats

I'm still healing from learning algebra be patient with me

Arcane activities with the crickets tonight